“My dad stole my boyfriend”

Julia*, 14, lost her boyfriend to her sister ... and then her dad.

12:0AM, Aug 24

Julia*, 14, lost her boyfriend to her sister ... and then her dad.

When I was in Year 8, I dated an older boy for a few months and I really loved him. He meant everything to me and I thought about him all the time – I was basically lovesick. He would text me good night and good morning and I thought he really cared about me too.

But while I was 12 years old, he was 15 and a few years above me at school. I knew that my parents wouldn’t really like me going out with a boy three years older than me, so I didn’t tell anyone from my family – not even my sister.

For about a month, he would come home with me after school and we’d hang out. I used to tell my mum he was a study buddy that the school had assigned to me so she wouldn’t get suspicious that I was spending so much time with a Year 11 guy. We would come home and go straight up to my room; Mum thought we were studying but really we’d just chat about everything and I fell for him even more.

Then one afternoon, I left my room to get something and when I came back he was making out with my older sister! My boyfriend and my sister in my own bedroom!

Of course, my sister didn’t know that I was dating him, so she wasn’t at fault – but I couldn’t believe he would do that to me! I didn’t want to start any drama though, so I didn’t say anything to him or her. I thought it had all ended, but then I caught them a second time. I decided to tell my sister about it and she was just as furious as I was. We dumped him straightaway.

After a while, my mum and dad started drifting apart. They eventually broke up. I lived with Mum and lost touch with Dad for a while.

A few years later, I contacted Dad again. He was doing well and he told me that he’d found a new partner. I was, of course, keen to meet this new person in my dad’s life. So that Christmas, Dad invited me to spend the day with them.

But when I arrived at Dad’s house and met his new partner, I was completely shocked. I couldn’t believe who it was. I knew him and, even worse, he had broken my heart. The older guy who had hurt both my sister and me was now in our dad’s life. I was really upset and torn up about it.

I left straightaway and ended up spending Christmas on a train while trying to get back to Mum’s house.

I didn’t contact Dad for a few months, I was still in total shock. But after a while, I started really missing him and decided to give our relationship another shot. I finally accepted that Dad was gay and that he was now dating my ex-boyfriend.

Now, a few years later, I’ve moved in with Dad and his boyfriend and, surprisingly, we all get along really well. Dad and I are closer than we ever have been. I must admit, though, sometime his partner and I still have our problems. I also stay in touch with my mum and I visit her every Christmas and Easter.

My friends don’t understand why I want to live with my dad and his boyfriend, but I’ve learnt a really important lesson, and that is that nothing’s worth losing your dad over.

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*Model is in no way associated with this story*

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